Head of School Chris Fortunato’s Commencement Address at Blair Academy

by Danny Mucinskas

On May 21, 2015, Head of School Chris Fortunato delivered a speech at the Commencement exercises at Blair Academy in Blairstown, NJ. Offering reflections and words of wisdom for the graduating senior class, Fortunato’s comments resonated with several of the Good Project’s guiding values, including the importance of purpose, the power of personal principles and ethics, and the vital need for people to do good work that advances our communities and society.

Read the full speech below. (Note: the text has been edited for brevity.)

As I have the privilege of standing before you, our Class of 2015, one last time together, I admit I’m feeling parental, experiencing the range of emotions that no doubt your parents and families are feeling today. I am proud of you, because you’ve accomplished so much; but more so because you are simply very good people. I am sad, because now at the end of my and Mrs. Fortunato’s second year, we have grown to know many of you–you’ve spent time with our own children, and you have brought joy to our lives, and we’ll miss that more than you know. I also feel as hopeful as I have ever been in my life, because you are all becoming exactly what the world needs for it to become a better place, no matter what you choose to do. I found myself, over the last couple of nights, struggling to find the right words that encapsulate this range of feelings that I and our faculty have, to do justice to how much I admire you, how much you’re loved in this community, and how excited we are for you to take on your futures and to live your stories.

I posed the question: How do I sum up the stew of somewhat conflicted feelings we are experiencing as we deliver you into the next chapter of your lives? And I found what I was looking for, what I wanted to say to all of you–and it’s this–“How lucky am I to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard!” The words come from author A.A. Milne and were voiced by one his title characters–an unassuming young leader by the name of Winnie the Pooh.

Of course, your varied and wonderful voices will echo in our heads and hearts long past your graduation. They have grown strong individually and collectively over your years at Blair. It has been our pleasure for us to hear them, help them grow and celebrate them even when they are quiet ones. There are moments when your voices rose in ways public and not so public that were simply so true to who you are and what you care about that they will forever stick with me, with all of us.

I am grateful to all of you personally as well, for as I have spent the last two years discovering Blair, you have taught me about this community, our culture, what we must always preserve and what things new we might explore. You’ve helped me develop my own voice, no doubt a work in progress, as your Head of School.

As you look ahead, change is all around you. It will in fact be one of the few constants in your life, in all of our lives. But I have also discovered and wish to share with you another observation, if not a piece of advice–the greater the frequency and speed of change, the more important it becomes to recognize and hold on to those things that must remain steady and true. Things such as these:

-Your principles define who you are and they can never be taken away from you. They impact every decision you will make. You will filter every challenge, opportunity, relationship and conversation through those values. So, as you march through life, please keep asking yourself–what matters most to me, what are the things for which I stand? Do this often, so you can know yourself and help others know the real you. Don’t steer away from this exploration of your values, of who you are and who you are NOT, even if others judge you or don’t understand, even if it at times it frightens you, even if you change your mind. And you will change your mind, which is entirely okay. It is part of growing up. Some people might fault you for being inconsistent or impermanent–I will, however, honor you for your trying to find your way, your true north.

-Another thing I also know to be true is the Blair bubble we so often talk about. People have been talking about it since long before you or I stepped foot on this campus. It endures and always will, but the best thing about the Blair bubble has never been what it keeps out but rather what it keeps in, what it keeps close and what it nurtures–curiosity, resilience and, most importantly, friendship. And here’s the thing: The real Blair bubble, the one that really matters, is not the one you leave behind as you leave campus. In fact, it’s the one you take with you. Inside it is the best of what you’ve experienced and what you’ve become, and it lives on in the good work you’ll do and in the people whose lives you’ll enter. Spread the bubble beyond this campus, and go out and make the world more like the best of what you’ve experienced here.

-Finally, throughout your time at Blair, you have heard the following, and I want it to be the words with which you close your time with us. Life is about love. Don’t ever forget that. It’s about love. Love of learning, of living, of family and friends. It is the reason, ultimately, that most of us do what we do, strive to be successful, make a difference and accomplish things that are important. It’s the reason we push ourselves past our limits, take risks and dare to share our stories. And you are, indeed, loved by the people here today–your parents, relatives, friends, faculty and your Head of School. Carry that with you in times of joy and hardship. And share it. That’s the real secret. Discover what you love in the world and share your world with those you love.

Blair Academy Class of 2015, we honor all that you’ve achieved and congratulate you!

2015 Commencement Speech Highlights

by The Good Team

Each year, graduations and the speeches that they bring provide us with words that encourage reflection on the questions that the Good Project seeks to explore: what does it mean to be a good worker, good person, and good citizen? We again feature quotes from a range of commencement speeches that have taken place at institutions of higher education in May and June of 2015. The quotations selected and presented here focus on various Good Project ideas, including finding balance in the digital world, the 3 E’s of ethics, excellence, and engagement, responsibility, values, and professionalism.

“But in addition to taking pride in your work, you should always ask yourself if you could be doing more — and by more, I mean doing more to help others. It’s precisely because you are so talented that you should never be completely satisfied until you have satisfied yourself that you have done all you could. For that to happen, you need to set your own internal expectations and do things that you know are right, even when no one would blame you for failing to act. This is just as important in your personal life as it is in your professional life. There will be chances, large and small, to help others who are closest to you, even when you are not expected to do so. No one will blame you, for example, if you can’t make it to your child’s presentation in an elementary school class because it’s in the middle of the day and you have to work. But if you can figure out a way to be there, go, because you know it’s the right thing to do.” – Dean James Ryan, Harvard Graduate School of Education

“As someone who runs a 24/7 digital media company and who uses every form of social media ever invented, I hope I have some street cred when I urge you to build boundaries, introduce digital detoxes into your life, and learn to regularly disconnect from the jumble and the cacophony and make time to reconnect with yourself. There will be many profound and fulfilling relationships ahead of you, but the relationship with yourself is the most important relationship you’ll ever have. And, like any relationship, it can’t be taken for granted — without care and attention, it will atrophy and, ultimately, break down.” – Ariana Huffington, Vassar College

“Graduates, your values matter. They are your north star. And work takes on new meaning when you feel you are pointed in the right direction. Otherwise, it’s just a job, and life is too short for that. We need the best and brightest of your generation to lead in government and in business. In the science and in the arts. In journalism and in academia. There is honor in all of these pursuits. And there is opportunity to do work that os infused with moral purpose. You don’t have to choose between doing good and doing well. It’s a false choice, today more than ever.” – Tim Cook, George Washington University

“You have to be willing to venture outside of your comfort zone. Being at ESPN and being in sports was my comfort zone. You have to be willing to venture outside of that. And don’t get in the habit of saying no. I said no for so long, about being in news, that I didn’t even mean it anymore….Don’t worry about the fear factor..Everybody in here has felt it, will feel it. If you wait for it to pass, you’ll be sitting on the sidelines for a very long time. And what I’ve found is, when fear knocks, let faith answer the door…I do not know what it is you want to do, I don’t know your hopes and dreams, only you know that. But I do know you have put yourself in a position for great things to happen to you….This is the moment you have dreamt about, and you have made it possible. So you already have that formula for success. Whatever it is you want to do…remember what you did to get here to this very moment.” – Robin Roberts, Emerson College

“People with vocations don’t ask: What do I want from life? They ask: What is life demanding me to do? What gap is there in my specific circumstances around me that demands my skill set? It’s not found by looking inside you for your passion. People have studied this. Eighty percent of you don’t have a passion. It’s found by looking outward, by being sensitive to a void and need, and then answering the chance to be of use. A calling, like being a teacher or a nurse or a scientist, comes with certain rules, obligations, and standards of excellence. These customs structure the soul and guide behavior and become deeply woven into the identities of the people who practice them. A teacher’s relationship to the craft of teaching is not an individual choice that can be renounced when the psychic losses exceed the psychic benefits. Being a teacher is who she is.” – David Brooks, Dartmouth College

“And at the end of the day, by staying true to the me I’ve always known, I found that this journey has been incredibly freeing. Because no matter what happened, I had the peace of mind of knowing that all of the chatter, the name calling, the doubting — all of it was just noise. It did not define me. It didn’t change who I was. And most importantly, it couldn’t hold me back. I have learned that as long as I hold fast to my beliefs and values — and follow my own moral compass — then the only expectations I need to live up to are my own. So, graduates, that’s what I want for all of you. I want you all to stay true to the most real, most sincere, most authentic parts of yourselves. I want you to ask those basic questions: Who do you want to be? What inspires you? How do you want to give back? And then I want you to take a deep breath and trust yourselves to chart your own course and make your mark on the world.” – Michelle Obama, University of Tuskegee 

Learning about Good at Project Zero Classroom

By Paromita De

From July 21st-25th, 2014 the Harvard Graduate School of Education hosted Project Zero Classroom (PZC), an institute for educators to delve into Project Zero concepts and see how they can better understand and meet their students’ needs as learners. Plenary sessions and mini-courses during the institute focused on topics such as creativity, comprehension, causal thinking, global understanding, and ethics. Sessions led by Good Project researchers allowed educators to examine ways in which issues of “doing good” arise in professional and personal realms.

Three mini-courses during PZC were taught by Good Project researchers. “The Good Project: Ideas and Tools for a Good Life”, led by Lynn Barendsen and Wendy Fischman, gave participants an overview of different Good Project initiatives and themes through interactive exercises and discussions. For example, findings on the importance of quality time from the Good Project’s Quality study were illustrated through an activity where participants observed alignments or misalignments between their personal values and the amount of time they spent on different activities during the week (such as work, commuting, spending time with family, etc.). A second mini-course, “Teaching ‘Good Work’ in the Classroom: An Introduction to the Toolkit”, was led by Shernaz Minwalla of the University Liggett School in Michigan and allowed participants to examine what Good Work means to them. Through this session, participants discussed what Good Work might look like in different vocations, explored their values, and deliberated on sample dilemmas from the Good Work Toolkit. Carrie James and Katie Davis led a mini-course titled “Cultivating Digital Citizenship – Strategies for Approaching Dilemmas of Privacy and Identity Online”, during which participants reflected on digital ethical fault lines – ethical issues that arise in the use of digital media – such as “privacy” and “identity”.

Two plenary sessions led by Good Project researchers discussed the influence of digital media on youth. Carrie James’ plenary looked at how dialogue occurs in digital spaces – such as commenting on social media – and digital dialogue can be channeled to develop our social and civic voices. Howard Gardner and Katie Davis’ plenary featured findings from their books The App Generation and a recent Good Project study on creativity and how it has been influenced by changes in technology. Project Zero Classroom gave the Good Project an opportunity to connect with educators and share ideas for making “good” a priority in the work they do with students.

Good Work Conference Reflections: Getting the Measure of Success

by Amelia Peterson

A couple of years ago Clayton Christensen, guru on the principles of successful business innovation, wrote an article for the Harvard Business Review entitled, ‘How Will You Measure Your Life?’. The piece sets out the guidance Christensen gave to the HBS class of 2010 about principles for success in their personal lives.

Last year, Matthew Killingsworth, a PhD student in Daniel Gilbert’s lab at the Harvard Psychology department presented as part of his dissertation research a new method to study ‘happiness’: he asked people at the end of each day to think back over their activities and respond for each, ‘if you could ‘fast forward’ through that activity, would you?’. Killingsworth found that on average, respondents would choose not to experience over half of their day.

The continuing popularity of Christensen’s article (which soon became a book) and the interest in questions such as Killingsworth’s is a reminder of our interest as a culture in evaluating the success our lives. I was reminded of these pieces last weekend by a New York Times post from a mother fretting about her child’s high school course choices. The writer, Hope Perlman, was angst-ridden, she explained, because “[her] goal as a parent is to raise successful kids” – and she was worried about how their choices now might affect their chances of particular kinds of success down the road. For, she admitted with the ‘candor’ perfected by NYT parent bloggers, alongside the wish for her children to be “well-rounded and humane” she holds another wish: “for them to achieve: top of their classes, admission to top colleges and therefore (this is my fantasy) assured jobs and material success.”

It turns out that Perlman has a whole blog dedicated to finding the meaning of ‘success’. I came across it while waiting for my ride at the end of day two of the Project Zero/Good Work conference on the subject of ‘Developing responsible, caring and balanced youth’. If being ‘successful’ remains a powerful life goal for so many, then those of us concerned by questions of ‘balance’ and ‘responsibility’ have a task: to ensure that success is not just a zero-sum status game but one that entails caring and fulfillment. Which brings me to my initial question: what does it mean to be successful?

On the final morning of that same conference, we were offered something by way of an answer from, unsurprisingly, the articulate mind of Howard Gardner. The question we should be asking ourselves, he said, is how can we spend time well? You can find a longer development of Howard’s ideas in this Cognoscenti post, but one way of thinking about it is: what if we were all part of Killingsworth’s study and thought at the end of each day – how much of that would I have fast forwarded, and how much was really worthwhile?

So what does it look like to be doing something worthwhile? In that same conference panel we heard veteran educator Ron Berger describe his 28 years creating beautiful work with his students. I expect ‘elementary school teacher’ is not quite the career Hope Perlman has in mind for her children. However, I believe that if she had heard Ron on that morning she would not have been worried about the low status or pay of the position. His enthusiasm for his work is compelling. Here, quite clearly, is a man who is able to spend his time as he chooses.

Quite universally I think, we value the power of this kind of autonomy. It is therefore bizarre the extent to which we have allowed it to fall away as a criterion of success. Our societal vision of success is one where the figure of your annual salary (or rather, your bonus) has become the arbiter of value, as opposed to what kind of quality of life you manage to achieve in your waking hours.

Think how different it would be if we brought to the centre of our idea of success, how we spend our time. The outlook does not invite past blanket statements about what kinds of activities or careers are, and are not, worth pursuing. Spreadsheets, coding, or endless meetings might be absolutely how some people would choose to spend their time, particularly if the activities form part of a larger sense of what they are doing with their lives and why. Yet for others, a lens that valued well-spent time might emphasize that they are far from successful by this account, and perhaps the only attraction of their field is the lingering sense of status attached to their hard won position. Making spent time our arbiter of value could also help us acknowledge the inequity at the lower end of the pay scale – if we valued human time more highly, we would have the proper response to the situation of those forced to work more than eight hours a day to acquire a liveable wage.

What this lens prioritizes is an experiential as opposed to goal-orientated way of looking at value, meaning and purpose. Both lenses are of course important – the value of a particular experience of spent time can vary depending on associated goals – but a focus on goals alone can lead to a skewed picture of how to live ones life. A picture that is liable to reduce the importance of attending to minor day-to-day matters that are not attached to a goal, such as the quality of interpersonal interactions. Overall, therefore, the time spent lens can help us to raise to its proper place something that is vital if we intend to be and develop more caring and responsible people: due attention to how we treat others. This focus simply does not fit well with a life orientated towards traditional conceptions of success, where achievement of goals trumps any time-bound or experiential concern. If someone is trying to achieve time-well-spent, however, then time spent engaging with others – or even just passing through a respectful interaction – never feels wasted, because human connection is simply the thing none of us can get enough of.

So along with what Christensen and Killingworth would say to Hope Perlman about how to help her children life a good life, we might add the words of Samuel Johnson: “The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.”

Good Work Conference Reflections: On “Embracing the Messy Path to Purpose”

by Alexis Redding

The first GoodWork Conference was last weekend in Dedham, Massachusetts. The conference focused on developing responsible, caring and balanced youth and included inspiring speakers including Howard Gardner, Bill Damon, Eric Liu, Damien Woetzel and more. Panels at the conference featured discussions of growing up in the digital age, the arts and good work, engaging youth in empathy and a discussion led by Howard Gardner with adult good workers. In the coming weeks, we will post a series of reflections by PZers and our colleagues on the conference, highlighting key moments and takeaways from the exciting 3 day event.

As a child, I relied on the oft-used ploy to delay lights out by demanding “just one more story” at bedtime.  My father, no stranger to my antics, would stand at the doorway and convey the final tale of the night: “Once upon a time, they lived happily ever after, the end” before plunging the room into darkness with the flip of a switch.  The first time he did this, I protested.  He was cheating, I said.  It wasn’t a real story, I argued.  But, over time, I embraced this 11-word tale as part of our evening ritual.

I hadn’t thought about his abridged story for nearly three decades, but was reminded of it over the weekend during the “Developing Responsible, Caring, & Balanced Youth” Conference in Dedham, MA.  In the morning on our final day together, Dr. William Damon described to the audience how “finding a sense of purpose doesn’t always work in a neat and pretty way.”  He warned of our over-simplified ideas about finding one’s calling and cautioned us about the “egocentrism in our dreams for our children.”  After spending more than a dozen years working with college-bound students, his admonitions rang true.  Allowing teens the space to listen to their own voices, to formulate ideas about the future that may look quite different from what their parents expected of them, and giving them room to fail is only a small part of the dialogue today.  Too small.

Listening to Dr. Damon’s description, I recognized that the little joke my father used to tell me is a very real part of the narrative we continue to tell teens today. We lead them to believe that life offers a direct path towards purpose, suggesting that jumping through each hoop along the way will lead to a “happily ever after” that may not actually be waiting at the end. What we fail to tell them is that the middle part of the story, the meaty bit where all of the richness of real life takes place, isn’t a straight line. And we forget to share with them the truth that life will be filled with many endings, some happier than others, followed by new beginnings and new dreams along the way.  And, worst of all, we neglect to point out that the obstacles that we climb over, tunnel under, and maybe even succumb to are what make the story interesting.  Indeed, it is in these details that we are most likely to find our true purpose.  Life should not be about the perceived “happily ever after” of getting into the right college, securing the dream job, or building the perfect home.  Though, for many adults – and for too many teens – we intone that it is.

To meet the conference goal of “Developing Responsible, Caring, & Balanced Youth,” we need to foster these traits in ourselves first.  And, above all else, we need to be truthful.  We need to show teens the people we revere as role models are almost always those who fell down or got lost along the way.  These are the risk-takers and dreamers of our contemporary mythology – our Horatio Algers and American dreamers of the modern world.

All weekend long we listened to such visionaries speak about the circuitous paths that they took and we felt inspired by them. Teens also need to be let in on the secret that getting off the beaten path can lead in the right direction and that failure is an integral part of success. As educators, we talk passionately about developing ‘grit’ in kids today.  However, without preparing them for the fact that life doesn’t always look like we expect it to in the end, we are not giving them the real tools to develop this kind of resiliency.

After this weekend, I propose a new version of my father’s story for the next generation: “Once upon a time, life got messy. But, then I made meaning… and it was mostly happy in the end.”  My dad didn’t include that middle bit in his nighttime tale, but he did include it in the decades of lessons he has taught me since then. These are the messages he has given me as I have fallen down, dusted myself off, and ultimately found the renewed sense of purpose that led me to this inspiring weekend conference.