Finding Boundaries

Jay and Logan have been co-workers and friends for several years. Recently, Logan started texting Jay a lot, sometimes every day. At first, Jay was happy to be talking to Logan out of work, as they had always been friendly with one another. But Logan was having some family difficulties with his spouse, and his home life had become stressful. Jay wanted to be supportive, but lately the texting had become overwhelming. Furthermore, Jay noticed that Logan wasn’t contributing as much to their shared projects, using his home life as an excuse, which left Jay working overtime in order to meet their deadlines. Jay cared about Logan and wanted to be a good friend. At the same time, the texting was becoming burdensome, and their work wasn’t getting done efficiently. Jay felt it was unfair that he was having to pick up Logan’s slack and put in extra hours. Jay wondered how best to set boundaries with Logan and get their work back on track.

What would you do in this situation if you were Jay? Who might you consult for advice?

Would your decision be different if the circumstances had been any of the following?

  • What if Logan had told Jay he was seriously struggling with his mental health?

  • What if Jay knew that Logan was being considered for a promotion and had been asked to contribute to his performance review?

Have you ever faced a situation in which you had to set boundaries at work?

This dilemma is based on a case from the Educating for Digital Dilemmas Project at Project Zero and is integrated into Common Sense Education’s Digital Citizenship Curriculum. We thank Carrie James and Emily Weinstein for allowing its use here.